Saturday, December 28, 2013

Christmas Day

Well they were off ripping paper early in the morning. Did my best to sneak down before them all to have a peaceful cup of tea but it was not to be. I heard the tiny patter of footsteps behind me as Aaron followed me into the bathroom whilst I was taking great care to brush my teeth.
Aaron had set his alarm for 6am but I had managed to sneak in and turn the bloody thing off so he would sleep a little while longer.
So the hen on hot bricks was down stairs clucking to open his presents. Not yet I told him you will have to wait so off he goes up the stairs to harass poor Simon who is not at his best these days. Nana had the same treatment. Aaron managed to scare himself to death and has now been scared for life after walking in on her trying to get dressed. Alas off I go to help the aged. Whilst in there I felt he needed a little lesson.
Bringing in one of his presents or so he thought I said you can open this one whilst you wait. He opened it carefully feeling a little guilty as he would not wait. Ah ah  I had the last laugh as he opened up to find a note " a smiling face with guess what your gonna love your prezzies " that will teach him. He was on the verge of strangling me when Simon walked in.
Settling down off with the paper gosh we had some nice presents. Aaron was spoilt as usual many a gift punch bag to a wonderful chance to drive not one but two super cars Ferrari & Lamborghini here we come. Can not wait for that one, he also got lots of bits and bobs including some pennies to spend at his leisure.
Simon got the DVD set he wanted DR Who also some slippers. I got some books perfumes socks and chocolates. Very Happy.
Nana of course was the other spoilt brat in the house. Lots of Boyzone stuff and Gary Barlow both of hum she would love to molester. She also got liquorice all sorts and a couple of nighties not forgetting the bottle of Taboo. One smiling old granny.
The animals did not miss out either Mr Jingle a cherry lick, the chickens two seedy licks, sooty furball treats, fish an extra pinch of fish food, the twiggies an leaf and spray of water and then Jake. Ah Jake is my Amazon green parrot he got a seed treat for Christmas. I have had him for over 20 years and he continues to be savage for some reason only he knows. I went to place the seed treat in his cage. We grabbed my index finger in his beak oh dear was the thought that ran through my head. I was about to be minus a finger naughty birdy. ( birdy : Simons first thought it the gorgeous Ivy Paige look her up on facebook ) she is rather cute wink wink.
Well to my amazement my finger remained intact. I blew him a kiss as Aaron squawked mum seeing my finger in the parrots beak. He is my buddy after all. Reg got a few treats firstly some denta sticks as his breath is not to be desired especially when he gets the taste for horse poo. Sometime`s he has a feast when were not looking.
With the animals treated it was on to the Christmas dinner I must say this was one of the best meals Simon and I have ever prepared it was delicious. Thumbs up all around. It was great to chill out later I even got to watch the Queens speech. Blissful afternoon and evening had by all.

A lovely Christmas day for 2013 great to have happy memories of Christmas. Some have been etched with heartache which has sliced through my heart. Story`s of Christmas sadness follow if your offended please do not read on.

Its amazing how good times fade away yet the bad thinks haunt you forever.

It was Christmas Eve 1989, Dad had ran out of Oxygen  all the tanks where empty. Looking back I was a fool not to realise something was a miss I had only just picked them up. We called an ambulance which took him in to Arrow Park. I followed in the car a short time later to pick mum up. 
Dad was always a moaner he was chuntering how he was dying, he would say that often but he was only 65 yrs old. He suffered from munachocous, asbestosis,  dust on the lungs and lots of other things. He had been in and out of hospital all through my childhood. I had watched him bleed from the lungs since the age of 3. He was poorly finding it hard to breath most of the time. My dad had never smoked.
He was still chuntering it was always banter between us. Many a time we played tricks on each other. As I got older I used to pin rude pictures above his bed minutes before the doctors called. He was a worrier and hated things going wrong. Suppose that is where I get some of my anxiety from as I hate  things going wrong find it hard to cope.
A time I remember well was in my teens when I was changing the Oxygen cylinder. Un screwing it there was a loud whoosshhh. The cylinder was a little faulty. The whoosshhh hit the ceiling. The in thing back then was polystyrene tiles on the ceiling. To my horror around 4 - 5 tiles came floating down around my head and landed on the bed. My dad may have been sick but by hec he could moan. He was throwing a fit at me but sadly I was by now doubled up in laughter.
Meanwhile back at the hospital Dad was his usual self grumping and groaning he was missing what was on television. He was still moaning ohh am gonna die. So true to form I turned to him and said "well bloody hell its Christmas day tomorrow so you cant go them the next day is boxing day so am afraid your going to have to wait till the day after "  He grinned at the humour. 
It was not long after the sister on the ward was getting agitated. So we had to leave pecking a kiss goodbye I said see you tomorrow.
It was 5 am Christmas morning the phone rang. It was the sister from the hospital she went on to say your dads not to well love can you come up the she said am sorry he has just died on the phone. I was in complete shock. I am still shocked to this day that she told me this on the phone one second he was unwell the next he had died. It was something no one could have for seen. He passed ever so quickly after suffering for so long in front of my eyes.
Shocked I went to wake my mum what could I say to her. I told her we had to go to the hospital. She was panicking there must be something really wrong for them to send for us. I could not speak the words she would have never wanted to hear. Driving the car I tried hard I had arranged before waking her for her brother to meet us there. I was only young I had no idea what to do.
I tried to prepare her in the life going up all the way I had been saying how unwell he was how he would be out of pain. I finally manage to say the words Dad has died as the lift rose to the floor dad was on. My uncle met us as the lift opened.
The rest of the day was a blur we had many visitors throughout. Life would never be the same again. My dad was gone and it was Christmas day 1989.

I never thought a Christmas time could ever get any worse but it did !

If you have been reading my previous blogs you will have read about Daniel at some point. Daniel was 10yrs old its Christmas Day 2007. Daniel has been in ICU at Alder Hey Children`s Hospital for 2 days. 
He is still critical. Today they have managed to get a couple of his organs functioning after the multi organ failure. Its still not looking good. A doctor takes me aside and asks if I would be willing to donate his organs. He tells me to think about it. Its Christmas day I am totally confused etched with such grief. I am thinking of it if the worst happens. But then I think about the machines they will take his organs without turning them off. But this is Daniel how do I no He will not wake up if  the machines are switched off. In the back of my mind I know Daniel if he wanted to live he would wake. 
I am also aware that he would want to save the lives of others if he could. Thankfully at the end it was a decision I would never have to make as his organs were of not use they had died with him. During this time it had never crossed my mind that Daniel`s brain may have died. After the first scan I thought all was well. Little did I no that whilst watching Daniel`s brain was slowly dying piece by piece. The hospital could not be sure as it was to soon to tell by scans. Its only afterwards you realise what was truly happening.
The hospital tried there hardest to make it a good Christmas day for us. They game Daniel an I pod docking station sid the snake I treasure him to this day. Along with some of the presents I took up for him to open. I treasure and always will treasure the new teletubbies I got for him that Christmas. I sat them on his pillow. They played there tunes. I willed Daniel to wake up but he continued to sleep.
Aaron was truly amazing during this time he was with me throughout the ordeal he watched the brother he loved fade away in front of us both. This Christmas was a blur of tears helplessness and shear heart ache. 

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