Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Daniel 7 Years On : Open Letter

It's now been 7 long years since you left us. New Years Eve will never be the same again for us. It's a time of reflection, I try so hard to think of all the good times we had in the last few years of your life, we really did have a ball with trips to Lapland, Disney land and Greece. We also ticked many things off your bucket list, concurring Mount Snowdon, you learning to cycle on your own, on the flat I need to point out, as your idea of braking, stopping didn't exist you liked fast and furious. Faster the better ! 
Suppose that was where your love of flying came from. Whilst I clung to the side of the seat or dug my nails into the unfortunate person sitting beside us, you well, screamed with delight as the plane went faster down the runway and when the turbo on the plane kicked in there was no stopping you. The smiles on you face I will remember forever. It made you so very happy.
There was so many things on your bucket list, lots ticked off but many things you never got to do. This saddened me, but then Francis from Hope House Hospice pointed out, the list would have and always would have been endless, so I would have and always would have felt this bad feeling. Aaron has achieved lots of the things I would have wanted you to do too. 
When we went swimming with the dolphins I new you where with us in spirit. When Aaron kissed the dolphin, just for you the tears flowed.
There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of you. I missed you so very much. 
It was sad to hear that Homer had died as well as Teddy but I know you will be galloping in the clouds and jumping over the rainbows on your RDA ponies with Fred your dog with you too.
It been a very hard day for me today. I thought about you all day but since 4pm I found it very hard to cope. I had many flashbacks of the last few hours of your life. Thinking of the nurses crying, Kent your specialist head in his hands unable to speak. He didn't  have too I just new your body had died. You had gone, there was just the shell of your body being kept alive by machines. Kent told me the machines had to be shut down there was nothing more they could do for you. You had gone. I was terrified the thought of you struggling for life scared me to death. I also knew if you had chosen to live you would have done.
As the tubes, drips were removed with Aaron and I beside you I could hardly breath as the ventilator was shut down and removed you just passed away so peaceful. You life was over and so was your suffering. Throughout Christmas the whole nightmare was just beyond anything imaginable.
I don't think many people understand the horrors, the nightmare you went through those last few days. It's a nightmare that never leaves. 
I do remember  you more these days with such happy thoughts. I smile more these days remembering you. I hope that continues as I write a book about you and your short but wonderful life you had. Happy times and times of heartbreak. I have publishes chewing my ears off over it. I won't rush it  so it won't be in the foreseeable future somewhere in the pipeline.
Let's leave my letter to you on a high. Keeping looking down on us especially Aaron as he has an important  year ahead of him with some fantastic opportunities ahead. He is not just living his life for him he is living life for both you Dan and big brother Callum too. I hope both my precious boys in Heaven love and protect Aaron as he wanders near and far on the journeys he has ahead. Watch this space as his journey into a young man begins xx
Loved and missed forever Run Wild Run Free and try to be good till we meet again over the rainbow. It's never the end I know one day we will be together again this time for always.
Heaven` Brave Angels Daniel & Callum  xxx
Xxx  xxx 

Daniel & Aaron 

Saturday, December 27, 2014

Jake Our Parrot

Jake the parrot I have had for around 23 year. he came from an old lady who was unable to manage him because he can bite. Even after 23 years he still tries to bite me "naughty boy."
Jake is a Conure Parrot.
Conures are New World parrots found throughout Mexico and Southern Chile. They're small but make up for it with super-sized personalities! The information provided in this article will apply to the most commonly kept conures: the Aratinga and the Pyrrhura genera.
He is a delightful little fellow who is a valued member of our family.

Thursday, December 25, 2014

A Present For Daniel This Christmas

It will be 7 years this year since we lost precious  little Daniel. We usually sponsor the two RDA ponies Daniel used to ride but sadly Teddy passed away and then Homer. As we have always said Clywd Special Riding Centre gave Daniel some of the most happy times in his life and me some of the best most precious memories. He, like I still do just love this place. To see special children smile and shine whilst riding these wonderful ponies is second to none. Everyone there is just wonderful. 
I have been brave and been back there since but each time I find myself in floods of tears, many of the staff feel that way too. Even now after all these years we are always welcomed.
This year was special it is my legacy to Daniel to help support the centre's hard work. We went up to choose two new ponies to sponsor. 
I had heard of one particular one from one of Daniels side walkers Gemma previous. Gemma to me about big Erik. She said I would fall in love with him well she wasn't far wrong. As soon as I saw him I fell head over heels in love with this huge gentle giant. Daniel would have loved him, I knew I would have to take into account how old Daniel would have been now, his size etc. Well Erik was defiantly one of the ones we wanted to adopt. Erik was stunning 16 Hand high black gelding just gorgeous. He towered above me Dan would have been at the age were it would have been quite possibly riding Erik now. So one down one to go.
I was pondering for quite some time unsure which one to choose next. It was so hard they are all so adorable. We wandered around  the Christmas Fair and walked to the fields to see the other ponies.
Eventually  after much thought we decided to go for a smaller pony. In the end we chose Bryn. Bryn is quite similar to Teddy a little chestnut with a white blaze to his face. Teddy although was a little dun gelding.
The deed was done Eve took us to the office where we adopted the two ponies and gave a donation in Daniels name.
The day didn't stop there Eve gave me a DVD which had clips of Daniel smiling and laughing at the camera riding little Teddy. A DVD I will treasure for always.
Happy Christmas  to my two boys in Heaven. Daniel & Callum,  Dancing amongst the stars and partying with the angels. XXXX
Also in remembrance of my dad who died 25 years ago on Christmas  morning love to you all 
Also thinking of all my other family, friends and animals that are also in Heaven miss you all xxxx  

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Clwyd Special Riding Centre

The first week of Christmas saw us heading to a place that is very close to my heart Clwyd Special Riding Centre. I have such fond memories of the riding school. Having been sadly told that the two ponies who adopted for Daniel died we just had to pay a visit. We have sponsored two new ponies which I will tell you about in another blog post.
It was  such a lovely day there was a Christmas fair in full swing so lots to see and do. Anyone  who knows me new I would have to go and find the ponies. So off we went, it was so hard to choose two new ponies to adopt on Daniel`s behalf but we eventually chose two. I pondered for a long time trying to choose a second on but the first was no problem I was just drawn to him. The ones I picked are not on this blog thats will come soon. In the mean time just take a look at the other gorgeous horses and ponies that look after all the disabled riders. These horses and ponies are just the best, they give so much love and happiness to many disabled children including my little Daniel when he was alive. 
I would also like to say a big big that you to everyone at the centre. I received a dvd of Daniel riding Teddy. The tears flowed it is a dvd I will treasure always seeing my shining little star smile and wave at the camera. Thank you to you all, we will defiantly see you all again soon. xx

My Sweet Boy . Chat It's Fate

Very proud to see Daniel in a magazine 
more to follow on my story`s of our very special boy 

Castle At Christmas

What a lovely time we had Spending a few hours wandering Chirk Castle at Christmas.


We searched and searched for Santa but he was well and truly hiding from us
I wonder why?