Mother's day will always be a difficult day for myself and my family. The death of my first baby Callum us strongly associated with this day. This year marks his 17th birthday. This time of year also brings back even stronger memories of Daniel.
The weekend has been extremely busy with karate competitions, a course and an engagement party.
This week has been very difficult after we lost our well loved little dog Fred. Its early days after his death at the moment but everywhere I turn at home and outside you can feel his bodily presence missing.
Its extremely hard for me to enjoy mothers day. To start I never wanted mothers day cards the pain was too much to bare. Nowadays Aaron always gets me a card but he is all to aware of the haunted look on my face as I open it. He also got me a couple of presents. I got a book I wanted and a CD. Nana also got a card and present. She blasted the music from her room on the CD player nicked from the kitchen.
I had a strong desire to go to my boys this year. Simon and I headed down to the Wirral battling the freezing temprature on the way. I bought lots of daffodils to brighten up the boys grave many had not flowered yet they were just buds. They should have flowered for Callum's birthday in a few days. My eldest full term boy would have been 17 years old. At least my boys now have nice flowers for the coming week. It was also nice to see the angels on the grave for my dear Auntie Olwen who died last years. Death is so sad but it is also a part of life that effects us all at some point. You have to learn to live with death and except it other wise you would go mad.
Anyway back to Mothering Sunday, with a table booked we headed off to the Green Inn taking Nana Dotty with us. We had a lovely meal later followed by a nice bottle of wine and chocolate dip.
All in all it was a happy mothers day.
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