Each day Fred the dog and I walk
for a least 2 - 3 miles mainly hill walking.
Before Christmas I was diagnosed with chronic lung disease, due to my breathing problems becoming worse, I believe due to the stress I was put under at the time.
At the end Of October 2009 I also lost the baby I was carrying at 13 weeks. His tiny heart stopped beating, I faced carrying and losing the baby alone.
Being the determined person I am I am determined to beat the illness and also not to become depressed after losing a baby I wanted so badly. After all I had been through previous many people doctor`s family and friend thought i would crumble and fall into a downwards spiral and become very ill, but again I picked myself up and got on as best I could. I believe sitting mopping around is a total waste of life.
My motto is you only live once, even then it can be so very short. So make the most of it.
When talking about my life to professionals`s they always say they have never seen someone who has been though so many difficult times ans still managed to smile. I am a very determined person and I have had to be since having to watch my dad being so ill slowly dying since I was a very small child.
I am pleased to say I am defiantly beating the illness thanks to the help of my new fitness regime.
Before having Daniel, I always kept myself fit and healthy. I exercised a lot due to having Daniel to look after as I had to keep fit so I was able to take care of him as he was such a big boy.
After he died I let myself go, put on a lot of weight. Losing a child you never get over its far different from losing an adult. With an adult they have had a life, it is far more easier to except. With a child their life has only just started. You grieve for the loss of there many years of life that would have been ahead of them, the wonderful times alive they would have had. Instead you have to come to terms with the fact they are in a coffin 6 foot under their life cruelly cut short. You will never see touch hold your child again. It is so very hard.
Now I am pleased to say the weight is dropping off and I can fit back into clothes I haven't worn for years. My fitness levels have improved immensely and my breathing is back to normal.
Living in this area the walking is brilliant and just on our door step.
Most days Fred our dog and I go hill walking. Today we took Jingle the pony with us too. Jingle isn't good on his feet at the moment. His age is finally getting to him he is suffering from an arthritic condition.
Birds also flew freely in the blue sky's. We saw a hawk flying with wide wing span across the field in front of us, he landed on a branch on a tree not to far away. He watched us with praying eye`s. Another rare site was a stork which took flight from the river`s edge and again he flew freely across the field in front of us climbing higher and higher into the sky`s.
It was a wonderful beautiful day here in Wales. There is no place like home, we are so lucky to live in such a wonderful place.